Friday, September 28, 2012


This new Old Spice product makes an unusual promise:

Because there's nothing ladies love more than
a man who smells like he's been in a sweaty 
locker room for the last 365 days.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012


MasterChef has some of the most enticing ingredients on the planet.

...and then there's this thing.

We told the contestants that the sea urchins were deadly dangerous.
They'll believe pretty much anything we tell them.
Much in the same way that the audience will believe anything we tell them.
Like, for instance, a blind girl was the best cook.

Gordon's buddy David Beckham showed up one day.

Me 'n' Graham

Guy Savoy catches on to my surreptitious photo-taking.

The MasterChef wrap party

Monday, September 17, 2012


Now that Season 3 of MasterChef has come to a close, it's time for a photo retrospective.

It began with the Audition Episodes, filmed once again
in a warehouse in the blighted city of Lynwood, California. 
Making an encore appearance: the scores of fake produce crates. 
(However, the mangy dog from last year was replaced by a new mangy dog.)

"I ain't no bum, Mick! I ain't no bum!"

I know that spatula's around here somewhere...

The first Team Challenge: cooking at Camp Pendleton.

This is the Sikorsky CH-53E Super Stallion, the U.S. military's biggest helicopter. 
It blew our crew off its feet (and nearly toppled the jib camera).

Someone tell the talent that this is gonna be louder than the limo they're used to.

Even though I'm Hollywood scum, the colonel was very nice to me. 
(He mentioned that he's not a big Bill Maher fan.)

We got million-dollar props and hundreds of extremely overqualified extras thanks to you, the U.S. taxpayer!

Wednesday, September 12, 2012


The next time the bladder leakage product company Poise decides to sponsor a sweepstakes, perhaps they ought to avoid one that ends with "or bust."