REMAINS OF THE DAY

 

Roll of 100?!

CELERY STALKER

Back when I was online dating, I briefly considered going out with this stalker.

ADVANTAGE: OXYMORON

 

BEFORE TONIGHT

Finally got around to reading Bill Carter's The War For Late Night.
I was amused that the example Carter uses to show that 
Jimmy Fallon could sometimes be edgy is a joke I wrote
for Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update.

 

PICTURE INSURANCE FRAUD

The Getty Image for "Insurance Fraud"
is a sticky note upon which someone has written
"Insurance FRAUD."

 

IT TAKES TWO

Imagine the conversation where Aaron tells the other member of the Duo his idea for the name of the act.

BURYING THE LEDE

This from a New York Times article...
 Buried way down in the piece —
Google was working on TELEPORTATION.

DOG SHOW

A big dog or maybe a small horse?

Some big ol' poodle

The Hound Group

Samoyeds?

Dalmations

Bedlington Terriers

"NORMAL SIZED"

You know… "normal sized" corn tortillas.

WINTER WONDERLAND

The Haunted Mansion at Christmas — skull wreaths!

(This slogan is true both for Disneyland and The Plague.)

It's a Small Christmasy World

The threat of rain kept park-goers away
but that led to this delightful Splash Mountain photo.

Apparently, the Millennium Falcon uses Owens Corning pink insulation.

And Space Mountain is held together with slotted screws.
Not even Phillips head!

The view through a window

Lit

THE WAITING IS THE HARDEST PART

We are not saints, but we have kept our appointment.

SCREWY

The printer wasn't working right, so I took the entire thing apart. 
After monkeying around with it, it works better. 
The problem must have been these 7 screws… 
which were left over after I put it back together.

GESTAPO THE CLOCK!

When you want your house to have that Nazi submarine vibe…
Pottery Barn's got you covered with their $189 U-Boat clock.

TOMATOES & POTATOES & BRUSSELS SPROUTS & GARLIC & ONIONS & ROSEMARY

Tomatoes and garlic

Brussels sprouts, potatoes, and rosemary

Added some onions and EVOO 

Roasting

Before roasting

After roasting

OF THEE ICING

HAVE YOU HEARD?

PREMATURE

Is Maybelline's "Baby Lips" a moisturizing lip balm for babies?
Or is it for women who want their lips to be as kissably soft as a baby?
Either way… yuck.

BACON

THE CROW

This is the balcony outside our offices. Some crows used to hang out there, so we started feeding them Cheetos. They loved them. 

After awhile, we got to know their personalities. One crow would mash the Cheetos with its feet first. This one would stack the Cheetos like cordwood in its beak and then fly off.

SLICE OF LIFE

A friend remarked about how the plastic thing in the pizza box looks like a tiny table... 

…so I made a teensy tablecloth for it. Italian style: red and white.

And then I made a puny pizza box for it.

That's a mouthful!

THE BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS

LISTEN WITH PREJUDICE VOL. 1

Of all the pan flute tribute albums to George Michael, this is one of the best.

BIRD-B-Q

The birds let me know when I'm not using my barbecue often enough...

…by building a nest on it.