Saturday, October 8, 2016

FORMULA

Still working the kinks out of my Westworld prequel

Friday, September 30, 2016

WITHDRAWAL

Three lines? A talk bubble with a plus in it? A flag? 
Come on, Chase Bank.
Use your words!

Thursday, September 29, 2016

PEPSI CHALLENGED

I can't decide whether Pepsi 1893 tastes like 
cola-favored medicine or medicine-flavored cola.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

THE ONE PERCENTERS

"We hired our competitor's unemployed former spokesman… all to get you to switch to our admittedly inferior service!" — Sprint

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

DISMOUNT ZONE

Get in the zone...  the Dismount Zone.

Monday, September 5, 2016

ENCHANTED

Yes, that "enchanting" stripper lifestyle...

Friday, September 2, 2016

THE BREAKFAST OF CHALDEANS

Get your day started out right with a breakfast that's really, really old!

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

(ツ)_/¯

(ツ)_/¯

SALTY

This Arm and Hammer Simply Saline I bought has been spontaneously emptying itself, making the can look like a cheap margarita.

Monday, August 29, 2016

HOLD THE FOAM

Sadly, Valtrex has been no help in preventing Paris' foam outbreaks.

Sunday, August 28, 2016

CLAP. CLAP. CLAP.

Keep it classy, Santa Monica Observer.

Thursday, August 11, 2016

GAME SHOW GANG pub quiz podcast

For years, my longtime friend and fellow game show veteran Doug Shaffer and I barnstormed bar trivia nights throughout the greater Los Angeles area. Earlier this year, Doug proposed an idea: what if we created a pub quiz podcast? So that's exactly what we did.

The Game Show Gang Pub Quiz Podcast is a 30-45 minute weekly show that's like bar trivia that you can play wherever and whenever you want. We're gonna do 10 episodes for this first season and then see how it goes.

It's available on iTunes and Stitcher and wherever else pods are cast.

Check it out here:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/game-show-gang-pub-quiz-podcast/id1111790171?mt=2

Thanks and enjoy!


Wednesday, August 10, 2016

TAKE ME OUT

          YOU: So, what do you think of Emirates Airlines? 
          ME: It's fair.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

BIRD DOG, PALO ALTO

Salmon with burnt cucumber and geranium harissa

Salmon

Heirloom carrots with red curry, tamarind and orange

POKEMON FEVER


Who! 
Who who who! 
Who let the dorks out!

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

THIS JUST IN

LA's local NBC News affiliate has finally resorted to full-on peer pressure.

Saturday, June 18, 2016

WE ARE NEVER EVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER

10 years ago this would have seemed rude; today it's probably seen as old fashioned.

Sunday, June 12, 2016

TONY TONY TONY

The ‪Tony Awards‬ honor events that happen on a few blocks in NYC. It's like if there were a national TV show crowning The Best Blackjack Dealer In Las Vegas.

Saturday, June 4, 2016

Sunday, May 29, 2016

POTTER? I HARDLY KNOW 'ER!

I bought the cheapest wand they had at The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
(The Stanley Shunpike: $28)

Thursday, May 26, 2016

I SCREAM

I'm not sure if I could explain Twitter to my 10-year-old self, but he'd be PSYCHED to be Followed by Carvel Ice Cream

Sunday, May 15, 2016

OFFENSIVE FOUL

Buy a new NBA-approved StubHub branded 76ers jersey for just $19!*

*plus $78.55 in Service, Delivery and Transactional Fees

Monday, May 9, 2016

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

You were there for me every single day, instilling me with your morals and values. 
Happy Mothers Day!

Sunday, May 8, 2016

POOP DECK

As always, marketing is the solution: just rebrand all these norovirus cruises as "Extreme Weight Loss Vacations."

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

CHALLENGE (PT 2)

Finally -- an account challenge question that I can answer!

Friday, April 22, 2016

LIFE IS JUST A PARTY

Prince‬ was a true original. As opposed to…

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

CHALLENGE

Single, childless, divorced parents, no younger sibling... I cannot answer any of these account challenge questions.

Friday, April 15, 2016

SEPARATED AT BIRTH

Celebrity Rehabber Dr. Drew... and Bernie Sanders campaign manager Jeff Weaver

EYE D

Apple Photos facial recognition software would like me to identify this face.

Friday, April 1, 2016

CLUE

So... that means OJ buried a different knife in his backyard, because...?!

Saturday, March 26, 2016

EYE SURRENDER

If it meant I never had to see the trailer for Eye In The Sky again, I'd strangle that hula hooper with my bare hands.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

SAN FRANCISCO

Land's End

Sutro Baths

Una Pizza Napoletana

San Francisco hotel room

Wait, what?