Tuesday, December 1, 2015

TBD

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Saw this sign on a door at Fullscreen. This may or may not be a room. To Be Determined.

Monday, November 23, 2015

SOCK IT TO ME

These "Queen Size" socks are okay but I was looking for something in a California King.

Sunday, November 1, 2015

CAT'S CRADLE: THE SANTA MONICA CAT SHOW (IN COSTA MESA)


No line for the Men's Room at the Cat Show.

The stakes are high.

Saturday, October 31, 2015

HALLOWEEN 2015

Continuing my annual Halloween tradition: 
I put a sign on the door that says "TAKE ONE PLEASE" 
and empty bag.

Putting the finishing touches on my Sia costume.

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

THE BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS

To be honest, this breakfast cereal looks more like Garlic Toast Crunch.

Monday, October 5, 2015

SECOND BOURNE

Ever have one of those days when an anesthesiologist who's got the same name as you gets indicted for stealing Native American artifacts?

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE OCEAN

Next stop on the Vietnam tour was the beach city of Hoi An. Whoever art directed this place is a genius.


At one point it occurred to me: "I'm usually on the other side of this ocean." Could you see me waving?


For reasons I am still unclear on, Vietnamese beach trash receptacles are shaped like penguins. Eat my garbage, Happy Feet!

On a scooter tour of the countryside, we got to see a woman who makes zillions of rice crackers in her home.

She dries them out on the porch like laundry.

For now: lovable pets. Later on: Bún Thịt Nướng.

I can't remember if this was tea or something stronger... like snake wine. Or gasoline.

The tour guide was delighted when I told him that I had a scooter in college, and encouraged me to take the wheel for awhile.

Considering the hyper aggressiveness of Vietnamese motorists, the caption of this photo easily could have been "Died trying to drive a Vespa in Vietnam."

Friday, June 5, 2015

METALLIC-UH?

Well then what is the Titanium Series coated with?!

Thursday, June 4, 2015

BUTTON

No, this is not a pictogram of Jesus' halo finger. It's a public bathroom flush button. What's weird about this flush button is that the manufacturer felt the button itself was not self-explanatory enough so they added the pictogram. And stranger still, the finger presses a button — but it's not the shape of the flush button.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

BLOW YOUR TOP

The headless mannequin clenched his fists, barely containing his rage.

Monday, April 20, 2015

THE PAUSE THAT DOESN'T REFRESH

Welcome to the future... where vending machines now have software. And when that software crashes, you can't get a can of pop out of the machine.  

I tried pressing Control + Alt + Pibb on this one, but nothing happened.

Friday, April 17, 2015

THE WINE DETECTIVE: EPISODE 5

I have no idea what this now-defunct Pasadena business actually did, but I like to imagine it as a noir detective series.

Friday, April 10, 2015

THE WINE DETECTIVE: EPISODE 4

I have no idea what this now-defunct Pasadena business actually did, but I like to imagine it as a noir detective series.

Friday, April 3, 2015

THE WINE DETECTIVE: EPISODE 3

I have no idea what this now-defunct Pasadena business actually did, but I like to imagine it as a noir detective series.

Friday, March 27, 2015

THE WINE DETECTIVE: EPISODE 2

I have no idea what this now-defunct Pasadena business actually did, but I like to imagine it as a noir detective series.

Sunday, March 22, 2015

THE WINE DETECTIVE: EPISODE 1

I have no idea what this now-defunct Pasadena business actually did, but I like to imagine it as a noir detective series.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

OLD SPICE

If Vasco da Gama could see how easy the whole spice thing is for us now, his head would explode.

Friday, February 27, 2015

IT'S HARD TO THINK

It IS hard to think of one… except for 
Lucy, Fonzie, Chaplin, Skywalker, Ferris, Gilligan, 
all of the Bradys and for pete's sake Sulu!

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY

The other day, my window disappeared. At least that's what it looked like. Got to my car — no window.

Turns out, the window regulator broke, and the glass vanished into the door. Without a working motor, the window wouldn't go back up. The price to fix it? $350-500.

Unless you do it yourself.

First I took the door panel off. (And left it in my kitchen because that's kinda funny.)


Then I removed the plastic weather seal and disconnected the wires.

Here's the shiny new regulator. I could've bought it online, but I spent a little more to get it from  Engler Bros Auto Parts in Santa Monica. The reason? If we all keep buying everything from Amazon, there won't be small businesses in a few years.

Repair time: about 2 hours. Total cost: under $100.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Friday, February 6, 2015

WELL, THAT CHAPS MY HIDE

Not one, not two, but THREE giant tags sewn into the waistband of the Gap's tagless boxer briefs.