I'm not sure what these things are -- they look like two metallic butt plugs -- but I am certain that they're the worst Olympic mascots of all time.
They're a particularly big letdown when compared to Vancouver 2010's Quatchi, the greatest Olympic mascot in history.
The official London 2012 Olympic online store has already started selling collectable pins with the zig heiling Wanker and Blinkered.
In fact, they're selling lots of different types of pins. Pins for Olympic events, a pin with a double decker bus on it, a pin with a Buckingham Palace guard.
And then there's tea.
If you like tea, you've got eight choices of Olympic tea pins:
But if you want to know that the chaps on the London 2012 Olympic committee really think of their city, consider that they've manufactured no less than seven pins celebrating Blighty's inclement weather:
Even the sunny day pin has an umbrella on it!